Tuesday, January 4, 2011


first shot at a new style.
here goes.

I’m running
Running. Running. Running.
This rut is getting deeper
This hill is getting steeper
Each foot is sinking deeper
But I’m still racing.

Each step enveloped in this sand
But it isn’t
It’s the sandman
Recalling dreams that I wish I could forget
And I’d erase it but it’s better to
Embrace it.
Lest I be a hypocrite..
I don’t regret them but each foot is sunken
Like your eyes.

Forgotten in those dreams
Addict eyes they wander and they wonder
But your only heroin was my words.
Dripping and hanging they flowed into your veins
Like a direct line.
Words are swords,
But on a smaller scale
They are needles.
Skinny needles
Shiny needles
But they are dull.
Ground down by every doubt
Cross hatched with second thoughts
But they still pierce.
Injecting and infecting
And you sucked up my lies
But they were what you wanted.
The truth is too much to get a grip on
So you fed on these thoughts
It wasn’t a flow
More like a drip and
It goes
On and off.
On and off.

But never the latter.
It was a constant
You lived for it,
This witty banter
But there is no humor in the darkness.

Happy times were
like light but nowadays
there is neither.
Like this smile that means nothing anymore.
Like this frown that means nothing anymore.
Like these screams that mean nothing anymore.
Nothing means nothing
When nothing exists
And everything’s a figment
The air im breathing isn’t there
And this ground isn’t bare
It’s non-existent.

But I wake up
And realize
that I’m sorry.
I was the influence and
You were under me
but I didn’t mean it.

I swear.

So here are the needles.
Just take them
Swallow them
Break them
Make them earrings
I don’t give a damn.

No more lies
Or the sharp tongue
I’ve given up.
My words are redacted
and retracted
and I’m silent.
I’m gaining traction
And I found
A rock to fill these gaps
That were created
Contemplated but now I’ve made a decision.
It’s firm
And I’m standing
No slipping
Because I couldn’t take this
Lying down.
Those rotten dreams
Are buried with the shell
Of the one who couldn’t handle
And as for you


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That was really good Miss Floyd. I want to hear you read it! :]